October 2009
13 posts
wander
Really, where is home, if you’re not there?
Where can I go to feel your embrace, to hear your advice, to know your love?
I find temporary replacements. I fill my heart with not so temporary love.
They love me, but not the way you did.
They offer a home to me, but it isn’t my own.
Some don’t understand, question, criticize.
I turn the other cheek. It doesn’t matter...
intangible memories flood my mind
as i attempt to mark them with material pieces.
the flowers that lay on his casket that day were white
because she wanted only the very best… and i agreed.
soft, moist petals adorned the chestnut case
that held him there in the front
for people to remember.
they all cried, kind words were spoken.
his body, taken away…
one
white
flower
...
“have a seat!” she heard him say,
“i’d rather not, if that’s okay…”
“but why, they’re empty, can’t you see?”
“i’m sorry, sir, it won’t suit me.”
“pick your color, sit right down!”
“i told you, no,” she gave a frown.
“ah, how am i to teach today?”
“i know...
*all photos used with permission
This is Vanessa. She is one of my students. I can’t discuss the specifics of her condition, but she is a bright and wonderful visually impaired 4 year old with whom I have developed a very strong bond with. Vanessa started in my class last year and was very resistant to working with anyone for many weeks. I started working one on one with her, taking on...
how can i apologize
for those things i truly
do despise?
coffee
watered down.
flower
wilted on the ground.
picture
such an ugly smile.
all that wasted time
i waited all the while.
clouds
that never rain.
pain
that never brings the gain.
lies
that i believed inside.
i paid
she took a free ride.
box
that doesn’t house him right.
disease
that won’t restore her...
Pour me a heavy dose of atmosphere
It’s getting way too quiet out here.
Lift me up into the sky,
I won’t forget you as I fly.
I’ll catch a star and name it after you.
When it shines, right on cue
I’ll recall fond memories of you.
I’ll shed my heavy wings
Let it go and remember things
Like the songs you’d sing to me.
The way your smile lit up my...
Conformity
Like a wind-up chime in a digital clock,
Bird aboard an airplane,
A crippled boy who’s told to walk,
Window made of cellophane.
I have no place,
I cannot be.
This expression on my face
Is the only one I’ll let you see.
I love to race,
You’d rather walk,
I’ll slow my pace,
Start the clock.
My favorite color was always blue,
But you like red, I see.
I must...
dad
on a hazy tuesday afternoon the phone rings, and i think… maybe it’s you.
maybe you’re not gone and it’s all just a dream…
if only heaven had a payphone.
you’d call and i’d smile, i’d talk and you’d laugh.
if only you’d come back…
i’d trade a million things to see your face or just for one more embrace
even if i had to...
Napkin
A red streak of something stained her perfectly pressed white dress
She looked up only to see that no one noticed the accident
She folded piece over piece to hide the blemish
Turning her head toward the sun, she realized she was
Surrounded yet alone
The faces around her began to morph into falsified smiles
And cackles that exposed the vulnerability of the laughers
Fairy tale characters...
Conditions, none.
I have three smiles,
He knows each one.
When I am broken,
I write. I wonder.
And when I am overcome with joy,
I want to share it with the whole world.
We dance on these days.
Music soothes me;
It helps me speak my soul.
My laughter is never nervous,
My eyes narrow and my head tilts
When I listen.
I am passionate about people,
Sometimes too helpful,
And always hopeful.
He watches...
She laced her shoes and tied her bow,
Then heard a bellow from below:
“Get your bag and get your coat,
And grab that paper that you wrote.
Hurry up and come this way,
I don’t have time for this today.”
She made a face and downed the stairs,
Trying to leave behind her cares.
In her bag a secret lay,
“What is that?” she heard him say.
With a blank stare...
The Unbitten Apple
The swing
Still and empty
She comes home
Fills the seat and
Unwinds her
imaginative mind
Sways freely
Mom is in the kitchen
Dad cuts the grass
Bits of sunshine dance on her legs
Laughter barely audible
Over the mower
She is safe
Happy
Young
She is the unbitten apple
Days pass
Weeks
Years
The sound of the drill
The saw
Red and white paint
Playhouse
A gift made from his...
September 2009
2 posts
Stuck like glue
Lately I have been thinking a lot about the bonds I have developed with people in my life. Some are stronger than others, some will last a lifetime, and some will fade. I liken the bonds in my life to glue. Before you find me terribly elementary or super unoriginal, hear me out. Some bonds are held together with super glue; these people will see you though the difficult times in your life when...
July 2009
6 posts
non-travel related musings :)
As I sit here enjoying lunch by myself, I notice that I really enjoy doing things alone. More than I thought I would. Don’t get me wrong, when I go out with others I truly enjoy their company and conversation. It’s just that when I’m with someone else, my attention is fully focused on them and I miss so many things going on around me. Today as I eat and observe, I am reminded...
“I love my father as the stars - he’s a bright shining example and a happy...”
– ~Adabella Radici
Midsummer in the Midwest
I’ve stopped keeping track of how many times I travel between St. Louis and Lincoln. It’s gotten as crazy as twice a week. What can I say? I have time on my hands and people I love in both places. :) Had an awesome time in St. Louis hanging out with the Lou-ians of course. Emily and I did some much needed (or not) shopping and laughed til we cried. Two nights in a row. Over...
June 2009
23 posts
“The ninety and nine are with dreams, content but the hope of the world made new,...”
– Edgar Allen Poe
6000 + and NO flat tires...
Do you ever think about how much time you spend in places other than the present? I know that I spend at *least* 40% of my “time” in the past and in the future. Replaying situations and planning for things to come… worrying about events that have yet to take place and reminiscing on those that have. Don’t get me wrong, I think it’s great to plan for the future. In...
“I travel not to go anywhere, but to go. I travel for travel’s sake. The...”
– Robert Louis Stevenson
Meet me in St. Louis, Louis, Meet me at the...
My week in STL was awesome. Got to spend a lot of quality time with my godson, William! Babies… they eat, sleep, cry, burp, eat, sleep, cry, burp… it’s… great. :) Taught him some songs this week and even got to watch him while Kelly and John headed out to a Cards game. Good times. Had some awesome nights with Emily, including a piano bar that rocked my socks off! Not too...
My Travel Map →
“To love is to risk not being loved in return. To hope is to risk pain. To try is...”
– unknown
Life is what happens...
… while you’re busy making other plans.
Couldn’t agree more.
Week 3 of summer break. Now in St. Louis and ready for some more quality time with some more quality people. I have to surrender my frustration with life when I think about the way I envision things and the way they end up turning out. Don’t we all sometimes? Don’t get me wrong, I’ve had an...
2600 miles later
So my summer started out as planned… awesome. Didn’t know whether I would go straight through to Wagoner, OK on the first day of driving, and ended up doing it and staying up another hour and a half after I made it. My mom’s place is amazing… serene and relaxing. Spent 4 days sleeping in, drinking wine with the fam at night, playing with the dogs in the yard, and taking...
May 2009
8 posts
Alone in a crowded room
Is there a random thoughts category?
That’s where I want this to go.
Something sets you apart from everyone else. It’s inevitable. I love things that are unique. The past couple of years have revealed even more to me about what is unique about myself. Everyday I try to embrace those things rather than discourage myself from being them. That’s hard, and I think that’s true...
Set the Night to Music (written 4/19/09)
I have been contemplating the impact of music on my life lately. Really, who CAN’T classify themselves as a “music lover”? So many genres, so many artists. There really is something for everyone. As I write this blog entry I am listening to my top 25 most played on iTunes. As each song enters the queue, I am reminded of when I downloaded the song and why. I am not sure if...
